June 21, 2011
5 Things Parents Do That Drive Teens Crazy (guest post by Hannah Dunn, 16) –
Teens love their parents. They, deep down, want to get along and have a relationship that they can always count on. However, sometimes parents forget that teens can be easily annoyed in different ways. I know that my parents don’t always realize that some of the things they do just drive me crazy. 🙂 Here are five of the things parents do that can drive us insane:
1. Ask too many questions
I, along with many teens, hate coming home to numerous questions. It is okay to ask how the day was, but often, parents just continue to ask questions. Eventually, teens will just start to answer with the normal “Uh huh” or other indifferent response. Instead of just asking question after question, as a parent, make sure you know if your child wants to talk then, or if the questions should just wait.
2. Unnecessarily nag us
I hate to hear my parents start listing things I have to do. Teens do have an idea of what needs to be done. If asked once, they will get to it. However, I feel that the more my parents ask me to do something, the harder it becomes to find the motivation to do the chore. Instead, my parents started to type up a list and leave it on my desk. By just leaving it for me to read myself and do all the jobs that day, I have the freedom to do each chore at a time that works for me – without the nagging.
3. Try to change our opinions
Teens are opinionated. We form our own ideas based on our family, school, friends, and even websites we use. Sometimes, these ideas just do not please our parents. Some ideas arrive with the change in generations. Because our parents existed in a time before technology like the internet and cell phones, they do not always feel the same way about something that may seem normal to a teenager. The dispute could be about anything – from texting and communication to other common topics. However, nothing our parents say is going to change our opinion. In the end, parents just have to realize that they will think one way, and we may think differently.
4. “Downgrade” our efforts
Often, parents forget that teens have a different view on life, for they have not experienced as much. For example, we think that school is a lot of work that we aren’t getting paid for. We don’t always realize that it WILL help us later in life! So, the worse our parents can do is call school fun or easy. For teens, we feel like we are devoting all our time and effort into something “fun and easy,” and that will likely make us mad.
5. Forget that one day we will lead our own lives too
Sometimes, parents spend so much time trying to keep us safe and happy, that they forget that we want the opportunity to live our own lives. In events that will not have a disastrous or dangerous outcome, it is okay for parents to step back and let their teens make the decisions. This does not mean full freedom – it merely means giving teens a chance to feel that they are trusted to be in control of their own lives.
Hannah Dunn is a teen writer for Radical Parenting.com, a parenting website written from the kid’s perspective–with 82 teen interns. Hannah is 16 years old from New Jersey. She loves to compete with color guard and marching band, and play piano. She hopes to become a writer one day, and to inspire others to follow their dreams. For more articles by teens and or teen experts, please check out RadicalParenting.com
Repost by Roadtripparenting – This article happens to mirror my own conversations with my sixteen year old daughter last week… regardless of your faith or family perspective, these are helpful insights for parents to consider. RoadTrip Parenting is simply suggesting you ponder this a bit before diving into your kids when you get home at night. I know when I get home and sense disturbances in my teens, I tend to jump in and try to fix things before I consider the entire situation. 🙂
Love to you all, as we all together “seek to keep our kids in between the lines and on the road of Life” !