Essential #2 for Parents

  1. Self-Care Essentials: When was the last time you invested in yourself as a parent ? (This Blog post is 2 of 5 in a series developed from the podcast series, Brilliantly Brave Parenting with special guest Paige Clingenpeel – season 5)

Parenting is exhausting, the idea that we can just persevere through it is a bit simplistic, in time we all run ‘dry’.

We need to rest. We need to recharge and refocus.

As parents we can’t give what we don’t have, our modeling and ability to teach our kids will be profoundly impacted by the energy we have to give them.

Listening is a huge part of parenting, “listening is the key to starting communication” both with our kids and our spouses. It conveys the reality of love and respect unlike any other behavior. We can’t listen without some energy, it’s exhausting to be ‘in the moment’ with our kids. We often lack the ‘bandwidth’ to be with our kids after a hard day of work.

Source – Pexels.com

Listening and being available for our kids is one of the hardest things we can ever attempt to do on a regular basis. Our lives are so full and busy, we need to practice ‘self-care’ if we ever hope to be fresh and focused for our parenting responsibilities.

Self-Care requires healthy habits, resting well at night, making space in our schedules to spend time with our families, watching our diet and exercise, and of course saying ‘no’ to other things to be sure we’re involved with our kids. We can’t offer what we don’t have.

Jesus modeled this idea when he would retreat from the crowds and the disciples to go apart and pray. He would withdraw to the mountains as often as he could, knowing the essential nature of rest and refreshment spiritually, physically, emotionally. We are no different.

Podcast Link: https://soundcloud.com/brilliantlybrave/reality-with-teens-ep44-paige-clingenpeel

YouTube Link: https://youtu.be/TBaUkmOy2QA

Notes and Quotes from our Podcast Interview with Paige:

  • Topic: “Self-Care” and Parenting-Self-care seems selfish, but it’s actually essential for parents to make time to recharge.
  • Modeling behaviors like ‘respect’ and love’ are vital for parents to show their kids
  • Listening is the ‘key’ to starting communication.
  • Parents need to not only take time for themselves, but they need to cultivate a trustworthy group of friends and mentors to gain perspective and encouragement from.
  • Surround yourself with truth-seekers and truth-speakers.
  • Self-care is creating space for God

About Paige Clingenpeel; LMHC 

A mental health therapist with extensive experience in working with families, Paige has a passion for those in the middle of parenting pre-teens and teens, Paige offers an encouraging perspective for parents who are feeling worn out. Her insights and speaking engagements are welcomed nationally at youth retreats and ministry events. Mother of four kids herself, Paige’s advice is formed from her own practical life experiences.

Check out Paige’s podcast interview and find out ‘whats going on in your kids head!”

Find out more: Paigeclingenpeel.com / TrendsandTeens.com / iMom.com

Brilliantly Brave Parenting Podcast

This is blog post 2 of 5, in our “Essentials of Parenting” series.

Symbolic. Prophetic. Probably.

Just recently spent a week alone with God to get my head straight. I felt led by the Holy Spirit to go to a ‘new’ place… somewhere brand new and undiscovered. An unfamiliar area with unfamiliar people, places… ways.

Symbolic. Prophetic. Probably.

In search of solitude with God… I had it all planned out. Even printed my schedule out.  Not even close to what would be.

Symbolic. Prophetic. Probably.

I had explored Mt. Washington in the eastern New Hampshire area years before, but never alone. I was excited to be driving up the mountain at dawn to see the sights. An epic drive with serious terrain, this elevation would provide views unlike anything else in New England. Sticking up out of the modest White mountain chain, Washington was a Rockies like 6,288 ft in height. It’s elevation so extreme from the valley below it included over a thousand feet of tundra and high altitude small growth – short season flowers and evergreens.

Mt. Washington NH

It’s top was bare rock face. Blasted free from any vegetation by the near hurricane force winds that roll over its massive top on a daily basis. Known as one of the windiest places on earth and holding the record for highest recorded wind gust for most of the 20th century… this peak had some juice. (For more on Mt. Washington)

When I wound my way up its alpine slopes, the scene grew from forested and peaceful to wide open vistas of valley and sky. This was going to be a promising day, I was getting excited to see the top. To gaze across the mountain ranges and most of the New England states, maybe if the light was just right… I could even get a glimpse of the Atlantic (about 65 miles to the south-east)

Mt. Washington Selfie – Pastor B.

That was the goal anyway. To see further. To gain perspective and clarity. My trip was meant to give some clarity on the future, on the path and plan God would have me follow. These mountain experiences were sort of metaphor for the actual life events around me and on me.

Symbolic. Prophetic. Probably. 

As I drove higher the vistas grew hazy and the clouds and fog thicker, my view was being obscured by the weather. What only a moment before had been sky blue for dozens of miles was now hidden, and my winding road showed more and more fog and cloud ahead. My hope for a clear summit on the top was fading.

Road to the top

Symbolic. Prophetic. Probably. 

It’s clear in retrospect that God was speaking to me loud and clear on this road trip, BUT… in the moment, I just felt frustrated, alone, and isolated. I had made all this effort to put myself in just the right place and time to hear and see God. But he it seemed had other plans.

My expectation was for clear skies, a warm glow of spiritual presence… followed by a sudden and keen transfer of divine inspiration, and a spark of new confidence for the next season of life.

His plan was different. He was going take me a different path, and He chose to slow me down and shift my perspective from the future to the past, to somewhere more personal.

Symbolic. Prophetic. Probably. 

Part 2, tomorrow.

What did I find at the top of Mt. Washington & Why does it matter….?

Pastor B.